The Gift of Solitude

We are living in strange times, ya’ll. I don’t know about you, but I had 2020 planned out. I was gonna take care of my body, feed my soul, grow my finances, and travel. I had coined 2020 “the Bad Bitch Year.” Well, it seems as though the Universe had other ideas. But, I am making the best of this crazy situation. I am determined not to let the growing amounts of people in Quarantine get to me. Instead, I am choosing to focus on myself–which was the biggest goal I had for 2020. It might not be happening the way I intended it to, but this forced solitude has motivated me to become more conscious on a spiritual, mental, emotional, and even a physical level. 

In January, I decided that I would spend my energy discovering new ways to grow. Shortly after I posted my last post on my birthday, I found myself strong enough and empowered enough to finally walk away from a mentally and emotionally abusive relationship. At this point in time, I haven’t decided if I want to write about that experience here or elsewhere in a longer form. Anyway, since I took those first steps, I have spent the first few months of 2020 returning to all the things I stopped doing for myself when I was in the relationship. It might seem small to some–or maybe even materialistic–but having your eyebrows, nails, and toes done does wonders for a woman’s self esteem. Treating myself to things that make me feel good about myself has always been my favorite form of self-care. 

While I’ve been away from the blog I have been going out more, working out, reading, researching, traveling. Most importantly, I have been smiling. So many people have told me that I seem to be glowing all of a sudden….If only they knew what darkness I had to walk through to get to this point. I’ve reached a higher level of understanding that life is not happening TO me but it is happening FOR me. I had to go through the past so that I could learn how to be the way I am now.

 Prior to COVID-19, I was basically in my own version of self-quarantine for the past 3 months. In this digital age, we are so used to being constantly connected to everything and everyone at the touch of our fingertips that we forget how to be alone–how to be still. We forget that true Peace is found within ourselves. I have purposefully spent time alone taking myself out on dates and learning more about what brings me joy. For me that looks like cooking more, working out, reading, some TV, and shopping. I’ve also been delving deeper into astrology and African spirituality. 

I know that this time feels like the world is ending and it seems that we will never be able to go out in public and interact the way we once did but–this too, shall pass. If I could suggest anything to make this time less stressful it would be to stay positive. Sure, it sucks that we can’t hang out in groups larger than 10 and we have to be six feet apart but that doesn’t mean we can’t have a good time. Use this time to unplug and refocus your mind. Take this time to recharge. Do your research, build those skills. Start that YouTube channel, build that blog. People are tuned in now more than ever. We are all in the house looking to the internet trying to find ways to stay sane. 

I know that we are in a global health crisis, but don’t let the fear consume you. Fill your mind with positive things. Fill your time with things that will prepare you for what is next to come. Use this time to build the foundation for what you want to achieve once this crisis ends. I am choosing to think of this time as a Gift. I was sort of in a rut writing-wise but the more time I spent watching Netflix I became quickly bored and just decided to get my act together. I was inspired by my own realization that spending my days in bed watching TV was not a good use of my time. So here I am, sharing with you again. Just because we are living in strange times doesn’t mean that we can’t be our most productive self.

How will you spend this time?